They don't half move fast

[L Austin France]

Spiders that is;
I was partaking of my morning constititional in my favourite 'garden' loo when a huge 'arry appeared.
I'm not normally bothered by our arachnid friends & decided that with carefull observation I could read my normal one chapter of a Kindle book whilst keeping one eye on 'arry to ensure he didn't take up residence in my shorts which were of course around my ankles.
Well I can tell you that 'arry moved like greased lightening as no matter how carefully I marked his position he was never there after only a few words were read.
Discretion being the better part of valour I gave up reading & whilst keeping one eye on 'arry, hastily completed that what I was there for, & beat a hasty retreat to the kitchen where breakfast awaited.
They might be tiny compared to us humans but they're scarry little critters when there's nothing between them & the family jewels.

[Bayleaf]

Too much information!

[Yonner]

Too much information!

Or maybe not enough!!
What the 'ell is a "garden" loo? Do u have a picture?

[L Austin France]

Too much information!

Or maybe not enough!!
What the 'ell is a "garden" loo? Do u have a picture?

No picture needed unless you don't know what a loo is.
It's simply a toilet built into a room which has two doors to the garden & used for a waz (ask if you're unsure what a waz is) when outdoors gardening etc to avoid having to traipse through the house to use any of the three other en-suite bogs on upper floors ( once again ask if you're unsure what a bog is) .
It's a very tranquil place to spend some time, unless of course, one has to contend with 'arry the spider.

[niemeyjt]

How do you know it was 'arry and not 'arriet?

[L Austin France]

How do you know it was 'arry and not 'arriet?

First rule of entomology.
All spiders are called 'arry.

[Sparkle]

@Yonner I've got a garden loo it's a Thetford porta potti that OH installed into a cubicle in our shed as when I want to go it's a bit of a distance between the garden and the first floor bathroom and frequently I didn't quite make it - my fault really cos I'll hold my pee for hours until the very last minute - well that was before age set in and now I can't hold it for very long So he bought me this potti as a gift and installed it into a cubicle but I do check for 'arry' and those what I call the airy fairy type 'arry' I could do with a shepee now for the car

https://www.thetford-europe.com/gb/prod ... -potti-145

[Yonner]

Too much information!

Or maybe not enough!!
What the 'ell is a "garden" loo? Do u have a picture?

No picture needed unless you don't know what a loo is.
It's simply a toilet built into a room which has two doors to the garden & used for a waz (ask if you're unsure what a waz is) when outdoors gardening etc to avoid having to traipse through the house to use any of the three other en-suite bogs on upper floors ( once again ask if you're unsure what a bog is) .
It's a very tranquil place to spend some time, unless of course, one has to contend with 'arry the spider.

oooh-OOOOOOH!! Get you, with your three en suite bogs!
We were evicted from our en suite bogs, but if you tell that to kids today, they don't believe you.

[Yonner]

@Yonner I've got a garden loo it's a Thetford porta potti that OH installed into a cubicle in our shed as when I want to go it's a bit of a distance between the garden and the first floor bathroom and frequently I didn't quite make it - my fault really cos I'll hold my pee for hours until the very last minute - well that was before age set in and now I can't hold it for very long So he bought me this potti as a gift and installed it into a cubicle but I do check for 'arry' and those what I call the airy fairy type 'arry' I could do with a shepee now for the car

https://www.thetford-europe.com/gb/prod ... -potti-145

See, now if you could identify the next but one to last minute, and set off early, you could have saved the cost of a porta potti and installation. But I guess it was a nice present!

[niemeyjt]

In my day they were Elsans - with some smelly blue liquid and a deep hole in the ground.

No luxury of a portapotty!